by association and other (not) related things

slowly getting back some down time and random things creep to mind. the grey area that is "... by association" is one of those creepers. there's many ways to take it but one in particular is standing out for me right now. i know i know, beat around the bush why don't i? meh, i don't feel like going into it so let's go into something else. you know, sort of like the idea of Attractive by Default (ABD) when someone/something is considered this or that just because of their/its relation to another, but in itself isn't really? i'll stop there before i confuse even myself. well, as a floater, that feeling's never been really outta my system, and recently, i've been feeling it more and more. that is that, "... by association" doesn't count. i wonder if it's because the holidays are around the corner and i've always had mixed feelings about them? the idea behind them i adore of course (family, love, good times) but sometimes they're almost fantasy-like to me. no-emo okay because i can't deny that i have a loving family and the best of friends but, at the risk of sounding like scrooge, it all seems so superficial sometimes--both "... by association" and the holidays. geez, sometimes i wonder how my mind makes these connections/non-connections. i'll look back on this entry someday and will probably think what the hhhh was i talking about?

oh well, at least this happened--picture!